4 days shy of 32 weeks

I received my blood work results late on Friday. They showed abnormal, which meant that I had to do the 4-5 hour blood draw again. My appointment was made for Saturday morning at 7:30. My step-dad took me and stayed with me through the pre-admin and the first blood draw. The triage nurse had apparently forgotten to write on my order that I needed a bed and an orderly to wheel me back n forth to the laboratory! So, I ended up lying on a gurney with no side rails, in the only room they have for blood draws, for close to 4.5 hours. I just looked the other way as people came in and out to have their blood drawn. Since I wouldn't know the results until Monday, I decided to just watch my carbs and sugars until then.

Well, today is Monday and it didn't bring any good news either. I called my doctor's nurse early this morning and found out that I do, indeed, have gestational diabetes. The easiest way to quantify it is to say that a 154 means no GD, and a 155 is the lowest number you can have to receive the diagnosis. Lucky me; I have a 155. Soooo, I have to attend a 2.5 hour course tomorrow at the Diabetes Center and meet with a nutritionist about what to eat and what not to eat. I have requested a good ole' gurney, but they are checking into that possibility. The worst part is that they have to train me to check my own blood-sugars. I'm pretty sure this might involve a needle of some kind which is enough to send me over the edge! To say that I do not like to give blood, see my own blood, or be poked with a needle is just a HUGE understatement.

Overall, I am trying to stay positive and realize that it wouldn't hurt me to learn how to keep my sweet tooth in check. Maybe if I detox from sugar, I won't crave it as much? The main things that worry me are that Kinsey will be humongous by the time I deliver and that the diabetes will not go away after I give birth to her. Those are my prayer requests.

31 weeks + one day

Tuesday was my second ultrasound with my regular OB (more like the 10th one altogether), my 2nd Glucola test, and another regular OB appt! I have to play the waiting game with the blood sugar results, but the ultrasound went well. I ONLY ate protein for breakfast and lunch...3 eggs and a boiled chicken breast with ranch dressing, so if that doesn't do it, then maybe we do have a problem! I'll find out later on today, I hope.

Even though the machines at my high risk doctor's office are better (and you don't have to drink water), they don't have the 3-D capability. I received six 3-D images today and she stayed in 3-D mode 75% of the time. My aunt and I saw Kinsey blink, and open and close her mouth several times. Her nose, unfortunately, looks like my genetics (grrrr) and her lips appear to be from Angelina Jolie. haha The sonographer said that both are due to being in fluid all the time. Boy, I hope she's right!

My Dr. said that I am to remain on bed rest until 34 weeks, following whatever the high risk doctor tells me to do. However, at the 34 week mark, all Terbutaline and bed rest will cease, and I am to go about life normally from then on. He said, "At that point, I don't care what you do and we won't be alarmed if you deliver." This kind of contradicted one of his earlier statements saying that he wanted the baby to stay in the whole time! Oh well! Kinsey is 4 lbs 1 oz and in the 75% on size. Both the sonographer and my OB mentioned this and said, "This is no small baby!!!" Oh great! Maybe I do want her delivered a tad early!!!!!! Geesh! I can't imagine delivering a 9-10 pounder... no way!!!

I will continue to meet with my regular OB weekly and my high risk doctor every two weeks for now. Is the countdown on? I don't know exactly, but for a short-term goal, we are holding out for the 34 week mark. Tanner is doing very well through this considering the circumstances. He is with a different person practically every day, but doesn't seem to have any stranger anxiety and they really aren't strangers anyway. He is just a well-rounded, well-adjusted litle guy!

Nesting phase--horizontal mode

Let me just say that the urge to get things done has definitely hit. I am pretty sure that I have entered the famous "nesting phase," yet I can't do much about it and still take good care of little Kinsey. Luckily, some things are getting done though:

• Grammie Elliott and Aunt Sonja bought a double stroller, which had been on my list of things needed.


• Grandpa Don reinforced and fixed up an old family wardrobe that belonged to Grammie's mother. Plus, he added to bars for hanging baby clothes. Grammie plans to paint it white to match the crib bedding. This is very handy as I may need to continue to leave my clothing in the big closet in the nursery since the master bedroom closet is Tobin's.


• Aunt Tricia is painting some wooden letters to hang above Kinsey's crib.


• Aunt Melody is letting us borrow her convertible crib which has a changing table and three drawers for clothing or diapers or whatever.


• We purchased a portable phone jack that will allow us to move the computer into a room that doesn't have a phone jack installed. This technology is just amazing to me!


• Tobin recently installed a kitty cat door so the cats can move outside (along with their litter box mess), thus getting them out of the room that will be Kinsey's.


• We were blessed enough to have a plumber come to our house and fix two problems in the kitchen, identify another (need new water heater), and narrow down the issue with two other appliances (ice maker and washing machine) all for FREE! Turns out that he knows Tobin and shops where he works, solely to visit with him; therefore, he said he wanted to help us out and not charge us! How cool is that?!

So, my list of to-do things is getting shorter. Plus, I know she'll be in our bedroom for awhile. I keep trying to remember that. Thanks to all of these wonderfully helpful and generous people! If I knew how to digitally scrapbook, I'd be set. Instead, getting her first-year scrapbook done and then boxing up my scrapbook table and supplies is high on my list of things hanging over my head. I also need to figure out a window treatment for her nursery.

I'm bummed that I cannot have a normal baby shower for her. I had registered for specific girly items the day before they put me on bed rest. My sisters and friends had planned a really neat outdoor/indoor shower at a local tea room/orchard. But, my doctors won't release me to both ride there AND sit for that long. Kinsey will have to get lots of Tanner hand-me-downs, and a lot of our baby boy items will just have to be used again, like the high chair, car seats, toys, Pack n Play, Bumbo, Boppy, blankets....She will have her own baby girl nursery though and her own baby girl diaper bag! All pink camouflage! I didn't order all of the pieces because it was indeed overkill, but bid and won on 9 items on eBay. Oh well, it suits our family and hopefully she will like it.

One week down...hopefully several to go!

We've passed the 30-week mark now! This last week was the longest so far, and definitely the most painful. A couple of weeks ago, I wished for more free time...well, I learned to be careful for what I wish. I now have more free time than I know what to do with, but no way to really be productive with it! I really wanted to have time to make Kinsey's scrapbook, move the computer out of her room, and decorate her nursery. Now, I have willingly agreed to be horizontal, jittery, have a racing heart rate, pain in my hips and back, and sporadic boredom, all in order to keep our baby girl inside longer. I am losing weight though...since I can't get to the fridge, I am not ingesting as many calories!! Plus, not as much fluid retention and swelling.

This past week has been busy in one way: scheduling friends and family that have been so willing and helpful in donating their time and effort with our son. My aunt, my mom, or my mother-in-law were here at 5:30 am just in case Tanner woke up early. Tobin had to be at work at 6am, so someone needed to be here in case he was hungry or needed a diaper change. Then, someone either delivered him to Amy's (wonderful babysitter and friend), stayed with him here at our house, or delivered him to one of our friends for the day. I cannot thank these people enough and Tobin and I both realize how truly blessed we are for our family and friends. We also see that Tanner is very adaptable and well-rounded as he is just rolling with the punches and smiling all along the way!

Today was my high risk doctor appointment and cervical measurement. It started off with a dreaded blood draw since my urine sample came back showing high sugars. Joy, joy...I just abhor needles and seeing my own blood. Turns out that Blueberry Morning cereal should not be eaten on the morning of any testing at the doctor's office. Then, the lovely cervical measurements. Tobin was with me, so he got to see Kinsey on the ultrasound too. I had not felt her normal activity for the last six hours, so I was a little concerned. She was fine and all fluids looked great though.

The sonographer took awhile to take her measurements, which of course concerned me. Evidently, she was perplexed and surprised at the measurements she was getting. If you've been keeping up, over the last three weeks my cervix has thinned or decreased from 3.3, to 2.7, to 1.8. I just prepared myself for another nosedive and had actually packed a bag in preparation for hospital admittance. Remember, she had told me that it would continue to decrease and once I got to zero, I'd deliver soon. Well, the measurements she was getting were ranging from 2.7-3.0!!! She took many pics to prove it to the doctor and made me stay dressed in a sheet until the doctor arrived. I was ecstatic, but still wanted the final word from my doctor. When she finally showed up, she kept saying, "Look at that cervix!!" LOL! She said that she never mentioned this as a possibility since it is so rare! She thought I was doing so wonderfully that she didn't need to see me back for two weeks as opposed to my recent weekly trips. Bed rest has really done wonders for my swelling and cervical thinning, so she left me on it, but a few things have lightened up: I can shower daily (yipee!), get out of bed to make my own food and eat at the table, limited car rides, and if need be, I can lift my son up for snuggles!! WhooooHooo! I am still to remain horizontal most of the time, but a few more freedoms. The goal is still 32 weeks, but obviously any time beyond that is preferable. She also said that Kinsey is probably just barely over four pounds now! YAY!

I must give the glory to God on this news. I know that the prayers of my family and friends are making a BIG difference. I couldn't have done this without Him and the enormous help from family and friends!

BED REST?

Tobin dropped Tanner off at Miss Amy's Thursday morning for a playdate from 8-3pm. We had decided to take Tanner two days per week to not only give me time to work on the nursery, scrapbook, relax, or develop lesson plans for my sub this Fall, but to also allow him to maintain his relationship with his babysitter and her son, his little buddy John Brady.

My high-risk Dr. appointment was for 9am. It was the regularly scheduled, weekly cervical measurement. Since I had a big drop the week before, I was anxious to see if things had leveled off. Within minutes, they had a measurement of 1.8, down from 2.7 cm. They measured again hoping for better and got a 2.0. I was immediately put on a fetal monitor to see if I was heading into labor or having contractions. The monitor measured 5 contractions, spaced 6 minutes apart, none of which I felt. From that point on, I was wheeled to Labor and Delivery and admitted into the hospital. I was so very scared for our baby girl and sure didn't want her to be born at 29 weeks. I was given a shot of Terbutaline (a bronchodilator for asthma) to try to relax the cervix and slow things down. Within minutes, it made my heart race and it felt like I was going to have a heart attack! This lasted about 30 minutes, with my mom and Tobin at my side. I am happy to say that the shot worked and there was only one contraction within the next monitored hour. They released me to doctor-ordered bed rest. This was a shock as they had been against bed rest prior to this second drop in cervical tissue.

Now, by bed rest, I don't mean lounging and hangin' out. Especially when I have a ton of stuff to do before she gets here!! I mean:

• Only on one side or the other, cannot lie on my back, no propping up or sitting
• No standing, unless it is to go to the bathroom, Dr's Office, or hospital.
• I can stand to quickly shower every other day.
• No riding in a car unless it to the hospital or Dr.'s Office.

The idea is for NO PRESSURE to be on the cervix and no weight, or the help of gravity, putting any pressure on the cervix. My hips and pelvis are already hating this bed rest thing, and just rolling over is a painful process because her head is right on my cervix, but not yet "engaged." Typing on my side, with my head lifted up hurts my neck, but at least it is something to do!! I am sooooo very thankful to my aunt for securing this laptop as I was going out of my skull with boredom.

I am already effaced 75% and have dilated to a 1-2 cm. I could stay at a 1-2 for a month, so it all depends on the thinning of the cervix. Both of my doctors have personally called me at home themselves and checked on things. I think that is cool. My fibronectin protein test was positive, showing that my cervix is probably releasing the protein that codes for the body to head into labor; therefore, my OB prescribed the Terbutaline in pill form to be taken every 4-6 hours. This is to keep the uterus relaxed and ward off any contractions. It is too late for a cerclage to stitch me up and keep her in there. My high risk doc would like to see her make it to 34 weeks gestation, but would settle for 32, especially since I had the two steroid shots to help her lung development. So, the short-term goal is three weeks and the longer I can lie here doing next to nothing, 24/7, the better. By the way, her name is Kinsey.

Now begins the tedious scheduling of friends and family that can help out with Tanner. I cannot even hold, play with, feed, or lift my son. Someone has to be here at 5:30 am in case he wakes up early, since Tobin has to be at work at 6am. He shouldn't use his vacation days until she is really here, or until she comes home. It is horrible to ask people to do this, but many have volunteered and I am thankful for all of them. It's actually a stressful thing to not be in control, for me, and be at the mercy of other's schedules and willingness. So far, so good, and Tanner is having a ball playing with his grandmas, Amanda, and Aunt GeGe!

The rest is all in God's Hands!

But, I'm only at 28 weeks?

WOW...I was surprised....yet not, but immediately emotional nonetheless. I went to my normal high-risk doctor appointment yesterday. To start off with the good news, my heart rate was excellent the doctor said, "If we could all have 98/64, we'd be in great shape!"

THEN, the ultrasound tech took much longer to do the cervical measurement than usual, but clueless me just thought she couldn't find what she was looking for or was simply going slow as she was training a newbie. Apparently she was just checking and rechecking, making sure that what she was seeing was actually true, before she broke the news. I'm quite certain that once the doctor veered away from her notes and started concentrating on the monitor screen, my heart rate was no longer 98/64.

Due to my history, and delivery of Tanner seven weeks early, my cervix has been measured several times via ultrasound for the last few months, just to make sure there are no changes. It has been a steady measurement of 3.3 cm until yesterday. Only God knows why, and He's not talking...but, within the last two weeks, it has decreased to a 2.7 cm!!! BIG DROP!!! When she told me what was going on, I immediately had to fight back the tears and concentrate in order to absorb what she was saying. Her words kept running through my head : "When the cervix gets to a zero, you will deliver your baby. I need to alert your OB."

Now that I have started this process, there is no turning back. All I know is that it can level out for awhile, but will continue to decrease. My cervix is still closed and that's a very good thing. But, before I could leave her office, the perinatologist insisted that I have a steroid shot in my hip to expedite the development of my baby's lungs. She said there were no drawbacks, and only 100% benefit to taking the shots; they had been giving them for 35 years. She said it would hurt like the dickens, and burn the whole time it went in, but my baby needed it so that her lungs would develop faster than normal in case of early delivery. I also had to return 24 hours later for another shot in the other hip. This was all to prevent her from being on a ventilator or C-PAP, if and when we are in the NICU again. She assuredly told me that baby girls are far more developed than boys at the same age, even in utero, so this is in her favor. Her odds are very good. They expect me to make it through June, but wouldn't commit to July, nor August. My due date isn't until August 27th. I know that it is a blessing that I am being watched so carefully, otherwise we wouldn't have a clue that I have already started to efface. I have to go back next week for another check and we'll go from there. She gave me several strict instructions about what I CAN and CANNOT do. The baby has already turned, so if I feel pressure like a bowling ball "down there," I am to go straight to Labor and Delivery. No matter what, an impending pre-term delivery is again upon us.

Here is my prayer: That God will not put her through more than she can handle, as He says in His Word. I pray that she can stay inside as long as possible to prevent any life-threatening battles. I also pray that God gives my family strength throughout whatever is to come.

I love FREE stuff!!

A few weeks ago, a lady that my mom works with asked if I would like to come over and go through her GIRL baby clothes and take what I wanted. She just wanted it out of her house! I tried to pay her and she wouldn't have it! It is difficult to get the magnitude of how many things are in each stack, but the bed is a king-sized bed and it is covered! There are stacks of NB, 0-3, 3-6, 6 mo, and 6-9 month. Then, there are stacks of long-sleeved and short sleeved. All girl clothes. I spent about 1.5 hours organizing the clothes into stacks for each size. This amount doesn't cover what both grandmas have bought and what I bought at a local garage sale! I plan to inventory this so I will have a better idea of what we still need, if anything. Isn't it amazing!!??

Tanner has been a little under the weather. His allergies are bothering him and he was put on Singulair granules that I just mix into his food. He also developed his 1st ear infection, most likely connected to the sinus drainage. Antibiotics for that. We are doing the breathing treatments before bed again due to some congestion and wheezing. Other than that, all is well!